Off-Season Outpost- Special Edition 1: Thinking WAY Outside The Box!

Okay...before anyone screams- this post is merely a "hypothetical" one, in which we'd finally take the back page away from the Yankees, for an entire season.

Drumroll, please.......................................


-------->SIGN BARRY BONDS TO PLAY LEFT-FIELD!<------- (Sorry in advance for the bad photo-shop job on Bonds!)

Okay- now that you have spit out your drink (probably all over your computer), just think about what this might mean to our team for the coming season.

1.) We could have Bonds in the line-up for about 120 games. With the way he racks up walks, we could put him in the #3 hole and all of the hitters behind him (Beltran, Wright & Delgado), as well as those in front of him, will see better pitches as a result.

2.) How amazing would it be to have Bonds set the all-time record for homers in a Mets' uniform?

3.) Love him or hate him, he makes headlines wherever he goes.

4.) With all of the salaries coming off the board, and with Gomez and Martinez lurking in the minors, one season of Barry at about $14 mil wouldn't kill the team's budget.

5.) Willie is probably one of the few managers who could handle Bonds, as a former player with NY ties, who was familiar with Barry's dad and is a well-known player's manager.

Okay- of course, Bonds can't field, he doesn't play nice with others, he'll cost us tons of $ and there's always the chance that he might get herded off to jail via either charges of lying to the grand jury or tax evasion. But think about it- we'd certainly own the town's headlines for the next year!!!

(Okay- I was under total duress when writing this column, but the doctor has put me back on heavy meds and I no longer have delusions of the lefty Bonds replacing the lefty Floyd in our line-up...for now...)